Your Favorite Family guy quote!

[jbsupra89t]

Quagmire (in the bar with the lesbians): Hey ladies, you ever been penetrated?

 

[csr ma71]

Stewie: "Oh I know it hurts now Brian, but look at the bright side. You have some new material for that novel you've been writing. You know... the.. novel you've been workin' on. You know the the one, uh, you've been workin on for three years. You know the novel. Got somethin new to write about now. You know? Maybe a, maybe a main character gets into a relationship and suffers a little heartbreak. Somethin like what... what you've just been through? (voice gets progressively higher) Draw from real life experience? Little, little heartbreak? You know? Work it into the story? Make the characters a little more three dimensional? Little, uh, richer experience for the reader? Make those second hundred pages really keep the reader guessing what's going to happen? Some twists and turns? A little epilogue? Everybody learns that the hero's journey isn't always a happy one? (voice returns to normal) Oh, I look forward to reading it."

Stewie Griffin I'd do her. Do her.
Stewie Griffin Wouldn't do her. Who hasn't done her? Do her.
Stewie Griffin Lose the pigtails and we'll talk.
Stewie Griffin Do her.

 

[??supra]

Quagmire (in the bar with the lesbians): Hey ladies, you ever been penetrated?

ohhh rightt gittty ggittty gitty

 

[Loki]

Stewie Griffin I'd do her. Do her.
Stewie Griffin Wouldn't do her. Who hasn't done her? Do her.
Stewie Griffin Lose the pigtails and we'll talk.
Stewie Griffin Do her.

 

[??supra]

Quagmire: Here's to the Drunken Clam, where they don't ask for proof of ID and neither do I.

 

[supra90turbo]

good work, loki. i love that episode.

there's so many i love, i dont think i can quote one without adding parts of others into it... so i'll just read, laugh and go "i remember that! hahaha"

Quagmire"Hey, whats all the noise, i was just mastur---...... waking up."

wrong-o
"what's with all the noise, boys? i was just jerk...innn out of a sound sleep."

 

[jbsupra89t]

Quagmire: Hey girl how old are you?
Girl: 17
Quagmire: 18? Great
Girl: Moooooom!
Quagmire: I like where this is going...

-J

 

[Ckanderson]

good work, loki. i love that episode.

there's so many i love, i dont think i can quote one without adding parts of others into it... so i'll just read, laugh and go "i remember that! hahaha"


wrong-o
"what's with all the noise, boys? i was just jerk...innn out of a sound sleep."

dont question a super mod, we are NEVER wrong! :ban:

 

[empera]

from the movie...

"you know wat grinds my gears? you quahog*, Fuck YOU!"

 

[??supra]

hahah definately one of my all time favorites
Peter: A guy at work bought a car out of the paper. Ten years later, Bam! Herpes.


Brian: Peter, did you read the fine print on this loan contract?
Peter: Um, if by "read" you mean imagined a naked lady, then, yes.

 

[dtoys]

STEWIE to LOIS: What the hell is this? I said eggs whites only!!! Are you trying to give me a bloody heart attack? [slaps plate to the floor] MAKE IT AGAIN!!!!!!

STEWIE in confession: Ah the breakfast thing.. It wasn't really so much about eggs..I've always liked the yellow part.. It's just that there's always been alot of tension between lois and i..and It's not that I want to kill her.... It's just that I want her not to be alive..anymore!!!

 

[CTsupra]

"The firetruck can consume eight times its body weight. ...The ambulances will have to wait their turn."

Stewie: "Do your hear yourself talk?...I might kill you tonight."

Mayor West: (Talking to his hand at the alter) "Quiet! You had your chance!"

Various other quotes.

 

[ross1]

waiter: oh, quagmire, the usual martini for you and a roofie colada for her?
quagmire: no, no, thats my neighbors wife

 

[lanky189]

waiter: oh, quagmire, the usual martini for you and a roofie colada for her?
quagmire: no, no, thats my neighbors wife

think you mean ruphies... otherwise people might not get it.



also how can we forget..

"The day is mine!"

and everything from the episode where stewie kills peter's sperm

 

[??supra]

i got it

 

[SnowMongoose]

"Dear Diary... Jackpot!"

"Are the Jews gone yet?"
<from the movie>

"Im gonna turn you into poo!"

"Cookie?"
<fucking whores start out early!>

 

[Mark3Supraholic]

Some guy: Oh God now I got to give this deaf guy 2 bucks for this piece of crap?
Peter: Hey I may be deaf but I still have feelings. Err, I mean umm.... What?

(Stewie see's Peter and Lois doing it)
Stewie: Ahh ahh ahh ahhhh ahhhh ahhhh!
Mayor West: So it's a shouting match you want eh? Well GAME ON Quahog! AHH AHHHAHHHH AHHHHH AHH I'm beating you! ahhhh!

Peter: Hey Brian whatcha doing?
Brian (worms): uhh, hey Peter, you know I was just uhh doing pilates..
Peter: don't try lying to me I know what you're doing.
Brian: You do?
Peter: You're looking for an Ass race, first one to the kitchen wins 1,2,3 go!

ANything from the south. Is Colonel Sanders in? I say you he dead. Or, aww Meg, I bet if we fix the house up it could be a piece of crap....

 

[CTsupra]

i don't remember the name of the episode, nor exactly what was said, but it was one of those flashback scenes where cleaveland was once a auctioneer talking all fast and everything, and then something hits him in the head and he starts talking slow like he usually does. that shit was funny as hell. i was rolling around in my bed laughing.

 

[souprat]

the episode with petoria(sp?) when mayor west is in his office with the bar of toffie. "and i'm a man who loves his toffie mmmm mmm oh mmm"

 

[LayZ]

forget the exact quote......

quagmire calls 911, "hello 911? ya its quagmire...... no its a window this time"