Alright, everyone. Sit down for this one...
I checked McMaster-Carr for fasteners and they don't carry ANYTHING M13. I finally threw the towel in and called the machine shop to talk this out. They told me they run a 1/8" pipe tap through the crank threads and that it's VERY close. You can then put a 1/8" pipe plug in and your set. I grabbed a tap and plug from work and I know as well as anyone - pipe is sized weird, but 1/8" is NOT going to sub for M13. I grabbed a 1/4" tap as well, with a 1/4" plug, just to try it out. I came home, and who woulda known - the 1/4" tap fits nicely in the crank. After about 2-3 turns, it starts to bite. This is where it will cut it's taper into the crank. Even as is, a 1/4" pipe plug goes a few threads into the crank without even touching it with a tap.
So, in conclusion... If you run into this, get a 1/4" pipe tap and a set of 1/4" socket headed pipe plugs. Tap that sh!t, clean your crank THOROUGHLY, loctite a plug, and thread it TIGHT.