This was an issue for my wife and me in the beginning. Not because she was hung up on her maiden name, but she wanted to keep her first married name as a hyphen. Her first husband died of cancer and she had a lot of feelings about having a different last name than her daughter from that marriage. It turned out it was really important to me for us to share my name and not hyphenate it. To me, anything else was just an indication that we weren't really becoming one in marriage - regardless of whether it was her maiden name or from a previous marriage. She was marrying me forever and our daughter would switch her name one day. This was one of those issues that was important enough to me to pull for and she agreed; and I love her for it. I could have given in because of her motivation for her daughter, but I have always had an issue with hyphenating for "feminist" reasons. You are either married for real or you hang on to your old life, but that's just my opinion.