A Man Walks into a Bar...

Loki

The Future is Unwritten
Mar 30, 2005
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Prince George, B.C.
When I read the thread title that is exactly what I thought of

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aye mate

Hiatus over.
Mar 30, 2005
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Maryland
Are you folks honestly saying you have never heard that before?(cept Loki)
Man I thought I was just being stupid but I guess I was inadvertantly humorous.
 

supra90turbo

shaeff is FTMFW!
Mar 30, 2005
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MA, 01440
If somone honestly has never heard of that joke, they need to be issued a free
"Get out of the house for at least one day" pass...
 

Joel W.

Just A Jedi
Nov 7, 2005
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Washington
A man goes into a bar carrying a peice of tarmac under his arm. "A pint for me," he says to the barman "and (pointing to the tarmac) one for the road!"
 

aye mate

Hiatus over.
Mar 30, 2005
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Maryland
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his pants zipper.
The bartender says "Hey Pirate! You know you have a steering wheel hanging out of your pants don't you?"
The Pirate says, "ARRR its driving me nuts!"
 

Loki

The Future is Unwritten
Mar 30, 2005
2,766
6
38
39
Prince George, B.C.
aye mate said:
A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel attached to his pants zipper.
The bartender says "Hey Pirate! You know you have a steering wheel hanging out of your pants don't you?"
The Pirate says, "ARRR its driving me nuts!"


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MassSupra89

Almost done.
Nov 3, 2005
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Saw this one on a Lexus forum...kinda long


A man walks into a bar looking disappointed and carrying a black bag over one shoulder. He sits down at the bar.
The bartender walks up and asks, "What's in the bag?"
The man puts the bag on the bar, reaches in and pulls out a baby grand piano, a small bench and a 12 inch tall man wearing a top hat and a tux with tails.
The 12 inch man sits down at the piano and begins playing Beethoven.
"That's amazing!" says the bartender, his eyes wide with disbelief. "Where did he come from?"
The man reaches inot the black bag and pulls out a genie lamp. "Rub the lamp", he says pushing the lamp toward the bartender. The bartender grabs the lamp and begins rubbing it vigorously with his bar rag.
Out pops an old, wrinkled genie. "I grant you one wish" he says to the bartender.
"I want a million bucks!" says the bartender.
"Done" says the genie and disappears back into the lamp.

Moments pass...

Suddenly a duck appears on the bar with a poof. Then another....and another. They appear on the bar stools....on the tables....on the Budweiser sign on the wall. POOF....POOF....POOF.
Thousands....tens of thousands of ducks begin to fill up the bar!
"*****"! shouts the bartender. "I didn't say ducks!" he yells, "I said bucks!!!"
The man at the bar looks at the bartender, "You think I asked for a 12 inch pianist?"